WILLOW STACEY

The man who thought he defined me, 2019 (120x120cm)

The man I spent the evening with, 2019 (54x54cm)

The man I wanted more from, 2019 (102x72cm)

The faculty member who couldn’t relate to his students, 2019 (78x54cm)

The man I am friends with, 2019 (75x56cm)

The man who drove off and left me after the third date, 2019 (64x50cm)

The man who believed his own lies, 2019 (62x96cm)

The man I keep turning down, 2019 (54x54cm)

The man who thinks the ability to do my job is determined my my appearance, 2019 (56×75)

The man living in the last century, 2019 (44x44cm)

The man who’s wife ordered a pint of Peroni, 2019 (54x54cm)

The guy in my mechanical engineering project group, 2019 (44x44cm)

The man who made it clear what he wanted, 2019 (73x33cm)

The man who told me he couldn’t read so I would read the menu to him, 2018 (115x44cm)

The man I told I didn’t want to bang because I was sleeping with someone else, 2019 (73x33cm)

The man I met in a Portuguese shopping centre, 2019 (21x21cm)

The man who cares but doesn’t know how to say it, 2019 (21x21cm)

The man with the self-inflated ego, 2019 (21x21cm)

The man who thought we had a connection, 2019 (64×49.5)

The man I was sleeping with affectionately, 2019 (64x50cm)

The boy who never thought his words would have a lasting affect, 2019 (64x50cm)

When someone says something to you that sets you off on a whole new journey. For me it was when I was doing a shift as a waitress in the pub I have worked at on and off since I was 14. A customer said “if a woman is earning a lot of money she is doing a man’s job.” and I was left with that conflict of being at work and trying to stay professional and seething inside.

The family all know that I talk through my art, this work started as a way for me to portray what has been said to me, sometimes really pissing me off. I then became inspired to give other women a voice. I have been overwhelmed by the words sent to me and I see this exhibition as a work in progress as there is still so much to portray. The feedback already from some of those women has been the most important thing; one said it was cathartic and another said they had been carrying around the words for years without ever sharing them.

When I was deciding how to make this work I instantly knew I wanted to put the words on something inherently feminine and the act of embroidery creates a conversation between the brash sayings and the delicate, domestic textiles.

So that was what it took to start me off thinking about the things men say.